Going Private Soon! The Secret To Instagram Success
Jake Paul? Donald Trump?? MICROSOFT PAINT??? Nope, this video is about none of those things. While the rest of the world zigs, I like to zag, and by “zag”, I of course mean that I like to not make videos about relevant situations or high-profile celebrities and instead complain about things that don’t matter nearly as much. Enjoy!
Is your shitty stolen Instagram page not performing as well as you hoped? Then you’ll probably want to watch this video to learn the unconventional secret that will forever change your online fortunes. I guess it's not really a secret though, I mean... I put the answer in the title. I'm now realizing clickbait doesn't work as well if you give away the secret you claim to have before people even watch the video. Shit. I messed this up so bad. But hey, at least I caught my mistake before I finished uploadi- oh fuck I just clicked publish. Welp. Too late now.
Anyway, to sum up the above paragraph, there is literally no reason for you to watch this video. Smash that like button!
Thanks again for all the continued support you guys have given me lately. I am trying my best to upload more frequently but you’ll have to just stay patient with me. My job tends to render me a very busy boy and it is physically impossible to upload more often than I currently am. If I continue to grow the way I have then it is very feasible that in a few months I might be able to do this full-time and post more of my video-documented sharts onto this god-forsaken website. We’ll just have to see.
And never forget, the little stinkers are the strongest force in the universe! Oh GOD DAMMIT. That was supposed to be a surprise at the end of the video. It was the only thing I hadn’t given away already. Fuck. I am so bad at UZworld. Please unsubscribe.
Here’s another secret to online success: follow me!!
twitter - twitter.com/drewisgooden
instagram - instagram.com/drewisgooden
facebook - facebook.com/drewisgooden
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The only reason I’m continuing the description down here is because I felt that, like this video, the description should be way longer than necessary and keep going long after you thought it was going to be over. You know what they say, “life imitates art”! Only in this case, “life” is a bunch of words I wrote and “art” is a 25-minute video about an app. Okay, the police just came to my door and demanded that I end this description now, for the well-being of myself and everybody reading it. Looks like they’re breaking down the door now, which is weird because the door was already open. Oh great, now they’re handcuffing me. Not cool guys! It is significantly harder to type this with my hands behind my back. I can’t even see the scrne anmore so im’ just guesing what I’m typhng an oh dfioak la;fjsi akiosan fuipajn;w jake paul asiugasflj amacewugs just a joke asdijbasdbes.